Welcome,
to my discriminating (and probably faithful) viewing several.
Thank you all of you for continuing to encourage & inspire me.
My name is Laura, and the rest of me you'll hopefully discover as we go along. One thing I will say is that I am both dyslexic and, while not exactly computer-illiterate, I'm not Christina Hendricks...mind you, she probably can't type either.
My dyslexia combined with poor typing means that I spend a lot of my time transposing my letters. This is mostly restricted to words like to, for, and, is etc (yes, that one too). So they become ot, fro, si, ect. it drives me insane having to correct them all the time, although there's probably an easy way to sort it. It's the doing it that's irritating.
If you guys can live with it and can remember what the words are, then I might just leave them as they are. What do you think? Perhaps I can try it and you can tell me if it's too distracting.
I am nervously entering the world of Blogs for a number of reasons. But the main one is so that I can practice my writing - find my voice, so to speak.
I have written as far back as I can remember. I found a scrap of newspaper recently. My Grandma must have given it to me. It was a photo of me aged 7 standing in front of a television in my school uniform, holding a poem.
I had won a poetry competition with conservation as its theme. Now at 7 I wasn't much of a conservationist - other than persuading my 2 brothers not to pull the legs off spiders - but I did love to write. I can see in the photo that I had my mum's foam curlers in the night before ready for my big break. My poker straight hair has already rebelled and is sticking out at a 60' angle, looking most odd.
My love of words is due in huge part to my beloved and now dearly departed mother, Ann. (I'll tell you all about her death one day - it was an incredible experience). My mum was unusual in many ways & she was quite a feminist. Not so unusual in the late Sixties? Well she had kids and did the whole housewife, hostess bit, but she raised me and my 2 brothers as feminists. Oh, and my dad. He was a civil engineer working for a timber company and travelling all over the world, in the days when not a lot of people did that. He was still expected to pull his weight round the house.
Now figure this: My 2 brothers are both extremely well rounded men. My older brother reared 3 sons single handedly for many years. My younger bro is married and takes charge of all household formalities, small and large.
Now me, I'm not so good. I have a mouse mat which reads: "I understand the concept of cooking & cleaning. Just not as it applies to me." That's me. I'm from the school of "can cook, won't cook".
Yes I am married, yes I'm a mother and yes I know how to do all the neccessary housey things. But I avoid them in creative ways that would make a child proud.
Do you know what my trick is in a supermarket? Now I really do have this happen so I'm not totally evil:
Whenever I walk into a supermarket I get this white noise in my head. Even if I have a list, I stand there trying to adjust and trying to remember why I'm there. Then I start wandering around looking at random things and picking them up and getting distracted by special offers. Then I pick up maybe two things on my list, a whole basket full of complete rubbish (by that I mean chocolate and wine - it's always chocolate & wine), then I try to find the end of the queue (it's always long) and decide that I'm so bored I've lost the will to live and I abandon my basket and leave.
Is this sounding familiar to a lot of you?! I bet. Well, I'm lucky enough (clever enough) to be married to an efficient, self sufficient man who is also skilled in household things. Not only is he great at DIY and enjoys grocery shopping (ok,so it's cheaper & quicker than letting me go), he also loves to cook.
He loves to cook because his last wife was also a very good cook and wouldn't let him in the kitchen.
Now, you divorcees out there consider this: (and I speak from hard won experience) Sometimes it's helpful to look at what we can find to be thankful for in our new "extended family". I have finally been able to thank my step sons' mother for raising such fine young men and also for providing me with a husband who is happy to do all the cooking. See, divorce doesn't have to be all bad!
You've probably worked out that I jump around a lot. I always have - mentally and physically. My darling Grandma Jose (my mum's mum - 100 in August!) used to say I had ants in my pants. She also had another less ladylike phrase - "you're running around like a blue arsed fly!"
Like my hero and fellow Scot, Billy Connelly (sic), I have a propensity to flit from one subject ot another. It has gotten me into a lot of trouble I can tell you. I'll give you an example (and yes I am blushing):
I once, in the middle of making love to my first husband, said out loud "I must check to see if the washing's done". Yes I really did.
I can hear all you women out there laughing and thinking about the times you've nearly done similar.
Hey you men out there! When women tell you they're good at multi-tasking what they really mean is that they'll be thinking about the kids' sports day next time you're shagging.
You know that thing when your thoughts and mouth bypass your brain? Mm hm, I'm really good at that. For those of you reading who know me - I try very hard nowadays to keep my brain engaged in the present moment, but sometimes it doesn't work - sorry.)
I am thinking of adopting an idea from The Fast Show. Remember, Paul Whitehouse etc? Too funny. "better than that..." and "you ain't seen me" and "brilliant!!"
Well, what about "this week I will mostly be... The character was a bit of a village idiot who dressed like an early 20th Century farm hand and lived in a shed. Every week he'd come out of his shed and say things like: "This week I will mostly be... wearing Yves Saint Laurent" or "this week I will mostly be... supporting the Conservative Party". Hilarious.
Well perhaps I could do "today I will mostly be blogging about..." and try to stick to it. Do you think that's a good idea?
I have no idea if I'm capable of focusing on one thing for that long without getting bored.
Since I haven't actually posted this, it's somewaht immaterial - so here goes! (I'm holding my nose)
x
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